A Bit Of Train Spotting From The Comfort Of Your Own Home?

Train-spotting and Mindfulness, who would have thought!
Those train spotters are onto something. Or are they?

Have you ever found yourself thinking that anyone who spends their spare time spotting trains or planes etc. are completely barmy? I mean, what’s that about? Would you not have better things to do than sit and spot moving things?

I definitely would.

That said, I do remember a teenage summer job working for the local authority in Finland responsible for maintaining roads. That was ‘back in the days’ when electronic traffic monitoring was not yet invented. I was sent off to a stretch of road to sit by the side of it and count passing traffic. It was a tick for a cyclist, pedestrian, car, lorry, tractor….

The job was fun to begin with. What would be easier after all than to sit by the side of a road under the beautiful summer sun with a simple job to notice passing traffic and make note of it? So, there I sat and ticked my A4 sheets diligently. I do remember being quite excited in the beginning and was paying close attention to the cars that were passing by. Their colour and the make and so on. I was enjoying occasional conversations with a passers-by getting off their bikes to find out what I was up to. I was also entertaining myself by imagining where the cars were on their way to. 

Hours passed this way but soon I found myself getting bored. I mean, it was a beautiful day in the middle of a beautiful summer and warm one as such. Perhaps some of those people were off to a nearby beach for a cooling swim and to have fun? On their way for an ice-cream? And there I was, doing this boring summer job to earn a few quid while the rest of them were enjoying the freedom of summer holidays. Why was it me who had to do this? I found myself thinking that I should be entitled to have fun like any other teenager or at least be given a task that was at least a little more interesting. Instead, I was dumped on the side of some road to sit there like some weirdo. I started to feel little stings of envy.
The portable picnic chair I was using started to feel increasingly uncomfortable as the passing traffic became a source of angst. I started to count the hours and then minutes, waiting for my ordeal come to an end. And as I counted the cars and the hours and the minutes, silently cursing the job, I felt my anxiety increase as the minutes seemed to double in length. I was wishing for the day to end and feared that I would be sent off to the same mission again tomorrow. How would I be able to survive another day of this?  

I also felt ashamed.

I had chosen to do that summer job after all, so really what was there to complain about? Why should I feel envious, anxious, angry, and also more than a bit fed up with myself with what I had chosen to do? Except that I had not chosen to sit by the side of the road. Oh no, I was put there like I did not matter and was not given a proper job to do like some of my other teenage friends working for the same department. I would not be feeling like this if only I was doing something worthwhile. Every person who passed by reminded me of this as they headed out for fun and more interesting things to do!

When I returned to the office to hand back my A4 ticks-sheets of paper, I did not speak to anyone and when I got home took my emotions out on my younger brother and my cat who were both running for cover!

I understand now that my predicament was not caused by the situation I found myself in. It was not the fault of the company, who put me on the side of the road to count the traffic, that I felt the way I did. It was not really my fault either. I did not understand then that the way I felt and behaved was because of the endless unconscious and conscious thoughts I had about the situation, and the beliefs that supported those thoughts. In my mind my thoughts were more than thoughts. They were the reality and I was being carried away by them even when they were clearly not helping me.

Now, this is where train spotting comes in, because, the key to learning to let go of unhelpful thoughts is to become aware of your thoughts and beliefs and by learning to spot them. Just like spotting a train. It is surprising how few thoughts we are actually aware of at any given time. In fact, the ones that we are aware of thinking about are just the tip of an iceberg. What sits below the waterline of an iceberg are our unconscious thoughts. All those thoughts that go round in our minds but which we are not aware of. Yet all of these thoughts and the ideas we believe in, both conscious and unconscious, effect the way we feel and behave.

So, how about becoming a train spotter of your thoughts!

In order to spot your thoughts, first of all you need to give yourself an opportunity to do so.  Sit yourself down and become aware of the present moment. A great way to bring yourself into a present moment and keep yourself in there is to focus on your breathing. Noticing how your abdomen expands with every in-breath and lowers with every out-breath. Up and down, up and down, up and down.

After a while you may notice your thoughts starting to drift away from your breath. When you spot that, congratulate yourself. You have just spotted your first thought train!  It is perfectly natural for your thoughts starting to drift… to the plans you have, the million other things you could be doing instead of observing your breathing and the movements of your abdominal muscles as you do so. Simply notice when that happens and bring your focus back on to your breath. Up and down, up and down.

On occasion you may begin to notice thoughts that keep on coming back.  Thoughts that are emotionally charged. That’s okay too. Each time you notice them, congratulate spotting yet another thought train and escort your focus gently back onto your breath. By doing this, you are training your mind that your thoughts are just thoughts and it is not always necessary to react to them.  They are just like carriages of trains coming and going. You may not like some of them and may feel discomfort and that is fine too. Allow yourself to accept that and simply continue to observe them and let them pass by.  
Of course you could choose to jump into one of the carriages and let the train take you away with it, and remarkably so that would be the easiest thing to do in the network of your own mind, but how about choosing to carry on as a train spotter of your thoughts instead? This could indeed become a new hobby of yours. Few minutes of thought-train spotting a day.

There are quite a few benefits of becoming a thought-train spotter. After some time of regular practice you will begin to notice how you have a real choice on how to feel and behave. So that you are not being simply lead by your thoughts and beliefs and end up reacting.  You will learn how to insert a pause between an unhealthy thought and a reaction and how this will help you make better decisions in your everyday life. Your stress levels will decrease and you will truly become the one who is on the driving seat of your own life. And when it comes to hobbies, this way you do not even need to leave the comfort of your own home, unlike those ‘real’ train spotters!

And the result of my day by the side of the road? All those ticks on the A4 sheets of paper were enough to go convince the local authority that the gravel road needed a proper surface. It was what the regular users of the road had been asking for the past year and until then denied.

www.enablepotential.com

Can You Make Me Bark Like a Dog?

“Can you make me bark like a dog?” I get asked quite regularly when I tell people that I am a hypnotherapist. “Not unless you want me to!” is my equally regular response.

Hypnotherapy is slowly growing in popularity in treatment of issues and conditions that number of traditional treatments have not been effective for, and is for example recommended by NICE for IBS. Despite of the growing popularity however, hypnotherapy still suffers from number of different misconceptions about what it is and what it is not!

One of the misconceptions is that the hypnotherapist can make the client do something they do not want to do. We all have seen programmes in TV of hypnotised people carrying out silly acts in what seems an uncontrollable manner. I often tell my young children that I wish I could hypnotise them to do their homework or tidy up their room. Unfortunately for me I cannot. This is because a person cannot be made to do anything they do not want to do while in hypnotic trance. Yes, people in those TV programmes bark like dogs, or cluck like chickens and so on, but that is what they have given themselves a permission to do! They have willingly entered into the experience knowing it is to entertain others. And they have been carefully selected for their suggestibility by the hypnotist.

As a matter of fact, a person cannot be made to do anything in hypnosis that violates their personal ethical code or values. Any suggestions that go against personal values and ethics are rejected by the person. I often run group sessions and remember a particular one in a series of weight-loss sessions. We were half way through a group hypnosis session when I suggested that all left over food should be thrown away. It is sometimes difficult to tailor-make suggestions to fit everyone’s beliefs in a groups setting and so it happened that one of the participants was having none of this. She opened her eyes and sat up suddenly and told me that throwing food away is being wasteful!

All hypnosis is self-hypnosis. Our familiar experiences of not remembering a journey on arrival, or having concentrated at work with such intensity that hours had passed in what you thought were five minutes, are examples of hypnoidal states, everyday trances, we all go in and out of several times a day. During a hypnotherapy session a trance is induced with help from the therapist, but ultimately the person goes into a trance by themselves.

I work primarily with clients who have anxiety related conditions or suffer from phobias, post-traumatic stress and depression. Some of my clients have tried several different types of therapies and medication without permanent help and have turned into hypnotherapy as a last resort. This is when I sometimes face the misconception that hypnotherapy is a magical cure that can fix all problems in one session! Yes, there are treatments that are carried out in a single session, such as smoking cessation. This is based on the principle that you will give up your habit in one go and leave the session as a non-smoker. Unless of course there are other underlying issues for which smoking is a manifestation of undesirable behaviour and which need to be addressed first.

Many of my clients have had their specific issue for quite some time. It has taken them a lot of effort and courage to try to overcome their issue and then finally seek this type of help. It would be unrealistic and unethical to promise an overnight cure or even expect for one; that somehow you can be hypnotised to simply forget your problem. Well, you can if you want to, but not with a permanent result as the problem will find a way of re-reminding you that it has not been resolved. Or in worse case creates another problem to hide behind!

Overcoming issues with hypnosis can be very effective and often a lot faster than traditional treatment either on its own or in combination with other forms of therapy, but it also requires time. Hypnosis is a skill that needs to be learned first. More often you practise self-hypnosis the faster you will obtain a trance state and deeper the state will become each time. And this allows by-passing the conscious part of your critical brain which in order to protect you from something or the other has created the issue being dealt with in the first place, and so the unconscious mind can be harnessed to reinforce the conscious mind’s effort to make a change.

Complicated? Not really, but it does take some effort and some time.  We need time to adjust to the changes we have made. Sometimes the process also involves what feels like a step backwards as one change initiates another and other issues are coming to surface or are resurfacing.

Each treatment and the number of sessions required to overcome a personal issue is as unique to the person as the person is unique. 

I see hardworking clients who are determined to overcome their problems. And I believe that if you are willing, you can, and that the time it takes is what it takes. Sometimes it takes two sessions. Sometimes four. Sometimes people see me twice a year for something. It all depends. But I will never promise a magic wand because hypnosis is not magic despite of how much we would want to believe it is.

The magic is in fact in the person in front of me who has all the resources available already to be unlocked for healing.

What's So Controversial About Love?

I picked up a random magazine this morning to read on my way to work.

An article about a lady called Erika Eiffel caught my attention. More specifically,  her condition called Inanimate Attachment or in other words, love of objects.

 Erika became well known in 2007 when she fell in love with the Eiffel Tower and after 3 years of frequent visits, going for weeks at a time and spending all day touching the tower, she ‘married’  the tower in a commitment ceremony before 10 of her closest friends.  She is founder of OS Internationale, an organization for those who develop significant relationships with inanimate objects. She has been featured as a spokesperson and advocate in a wide variety of publications, and on radio talk shows and television programs and has an entry in Wikipedia.

People with Inanimate Attachment, and who are called objectum sexual or OS, form romantic relationships with inanimate objects. Instead of boyfriends and girlfriends their partners are things, bridges, walls, buildings, cars and so on.

Objectum sexuals are animists, who believe everything in the world has a spirit and a soul. The OS International website reports that one third of OS people have been diagnosed with autism or Asperger’s Syndrome, disorder whose sufferers often struggle to form human relationships. However, OS people are full functioning members of society rather than introverts and can connect with people although choose objects themselves. Some are even married with kids.

An OS person would be classified as a fetishist if one sought treatment. However, according to OSI, objectum-sexuality is not a fetish; while a fetishist must have their desired object present as a catalyst to achieve sexual gratification, the OS love for the object is not based on a habitual psychosexual response.  It is the object that captivates OS person on many more levels besides sexual arousal.  Fetishists do not see the object as animate as OS people do and therefore do not commence to develop a loving relationship with the object.

The Eiffel Tower is not first or the only love of Erika Eiffel. It has been reported she fell in love with marching drums and became so skilled that she ended up playing in the inauguration ceremony of George Bush.  Her love for a F-15 Fighter jet won her a $250,000 scholarship to the United States Air Force Academy, and her love for Lance, a bow, helped her to become a World Class archer. Eiffel has said she doesn't have Asperger's syndrome, nor does she believe her chaotic childhood - shuffling between foster homes before she was adopted-  contributed to OS.

I thought the topic was interesting and chatted about it with colleagues over a cup of coffee at the office. After the initial curiosity and perhaps surprised comments and various different point of views, we all agreed that it does not matter what your sexual orientation is; hetero, homo or objectum.

What matters instead is that the relationship works for you and is appropriate for you in your life.

Ms Eiffel’s love for her bow brought her to the World Class level in athletics, driven purely by the spiritual connection with her equipment. Wouldn’t we all want such a spiritual connection with the object of our affections, - man, female or an 'it'?

Where Is Your Ship Sailing To?

The relationship between the Subconscious and Conscious Mind could be described as a relationship between a captain of a ship and the crew. To keep the ship on a safe course to the desired destination, the captain and the crew must work closely together.

Most of us are familiar with the differences between the role of a captain and a crew member, but what about the subconscious and conscious mind;
 
Our imagination, permanent memory, emotion, habits and self-preservation impulses are held in the subconscious mind. In fact, the number of activities our subconscious mind carries out is astounding!

Without realising it, we rely upon our subconscious mind to master the complex skills we need to cope with everyday life. Walking, talking, driving a car or suddenly remembering something important, - these all depend upon subconscious activities.

Our conscious mind, on the other hand, is responsible for the rational and analytical thinking, willpower and temporary memory. So that or conscious mind would not get overwhelmed by the millions of pieces of information that it receives every day, majority of the information our brain receives is filtered, deleted and generalised based on individual criteria. - These are the rules, values, beliefs about how things should be in our schema, the model of our world, so that only any 7+- 2 pieces of information is held at any time in our conscious mind.

Both roles are important and needed to ensure we operate well.

The ship, captain and the crew metaphor explains the relationship between the subconscious and conscious mind beautifully:
 
The relationship between the subconscious and conscious mind could be described as a relationship between a captain of a ship and the crew. The captain (conscious mind) develops charts and maps (schema) that describe the way that the world should look and uses these charts to tell the crew (subconscious) where to go.

The captain also decides what skills the crew must learn in order to operate the ship. This arrangement works reasonably well as long as the charts and maps are accurate, the crew has learned right skills and close co-operation is maintained between the captain and the crew.

It also works as long as the crew does not upset the captain by pointing out the things that the captain does not want to see, such as a new harbour or an island that are not on his map. As the ship cruses along the river of life, the many harbours, islands and icebergs are noted by the crew whether they are on the captain’s map or not. -The navigational errors or even disasters occur if the captain constantly refuses to use the crew’s skills or accept new information to change charts of reality.

In the simplest terms, the goal orientated coaching and hypnotherapy work in that it helps the captain to utilise the skills and knowledge held by the crew so that the charts and maps can be updated. This enables for the ship to stay on course so it will get to the desired destination, or for co-ordinates for the new destination to be established.

Where is your ship sailing to?

Proof Is In Eating The Pudding -Or Maybe Not?

A while ago I teamed up with a Health Adviser colleague to jointly build a weight loss programme for groups using both cognitive & physical training and hypnosis to boost the unconscious effort.

Our programme outline is now ready and we are launching the programme  in October. But, how successful would our programme be without us first walking the talk?

Therefore, we are walking, both metaphorically and physically!

To kick off the process I had my weight and fat %, metabolic rate & age and so on measured for the first time in 20 years, as until now, I have been avoiding scales for the fear of what I might find out and how I'd feel about it. Does this sound familiar?

I had an idea on some level what I would weigh and was surprised to find out that I was only couple of kilograms off my estimate when I got the result. Isn't it fascinating how the unconscious mind knows about these things even if I had consciously decided to ignore and avoid the scales!

Well, one thing is for sure; I certainly got a confirmation that I have a lot of work to do with reducing my weight to get to where I want to be in the next few weeks.

My weight has slowly crept up over the years, but I am not alone in this situation. The fact is that 25% of women and 20% of men in the UK are now classified as obese and even 10% of the 6 year olds. This compares with 1980 when only 8% of women and 6% of men were classified as obese. 

The cost of obesity in UK economy is a massive £2.6 billion per annum.

As for how I feel about finding the facts about my current weight and my metabolic age? Well, let’s put it this way;  if I had nothing to work on, I would not necessarily have the reason or drive to help others with issues relating to their weight. I would not have the motivation to put my best effort in work to generate a programme that really works!

Irving Kirsch carried out a research on Hypnosis and Weight Loss in 1996. The research on Hypnotic enhancement of cognitive-behavioural weight loss treatments (Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 64 (3), 517-519) identified that;

"Average across post treatment and follow-up assessment periods, the mean weight loss was 6.00lb (2.72kg) without hypnosis and 11.83 lbs. (5.37kg) with hypnosis.

At the last assessment period, the mean weight loss was 6.03lbs (2.74kg) without hypnosis and 14.88 lbs. (6.75kg) with hypnosis. Correlational analyses indicated that the benefits of hypnosis increased substantially over time."

There is clear evidence that use of hypnosis is beneficial for weight loss, it will make it easier and you can lose twice as much weight with hypnosis than without.

A client of mine, who I worked with in one-to-one sessions to help her meet her goal of losing weight, contacted me after the final session and said:

" Thank you for working with me over the last few weeks. I have now started to see and feel some real changes in lifelong bad habits. I can't thank you enough for taking me on this journey, and look forward to using the self -hypnosis techniques I learned to make more and more changes."

Encouraged by the results of the study, personal experience in helping people in one-to-one sessions and a new holistic programme comprising of cognitive understanding and re-education, physical training and hypnosis to make some real  and permanent changes, I am looking forward to my soon-to-be leaner and healthier body.

So, the proof of the effectives of our weight loss programme is in the walking the talk and not in eating the pudding!

And the walk has just started.  Watch this space; I will be sharing the progress regularly in this blog starting in September.

Individual hypnotherapy sessions outside the programme for weight loss are available at Harley Street in London. Contact teija.barr@enablepotential.com for details or call on +44 (0)20 7193 9981.

Anxiety Disorders

Anxiety is a normal, if unpleasant, part of life, and it can affect us all in different ways and at different times. Whereas stress is something that will come and go as the external factor causing it (be it a work, relationship or money problems, etc.) comes and goes, anxiety is something that can persist whether or not the cause is clear to the sufferer.

It is important to recognise that anxiety is normal and exists due to the preconditioned bodily responses from early human existence.  It was useful at a time when human survival dependent on our instincts to remain alert and react to a perceived threats and therefore helped to keep us safe. This internal alarm system helped by keeping us hyper-alert, raising the levels of adrenaline and heart rate releasing extra oxygen into the system so that we were able to respond to a threat by fighting or running away.

There are many reasons why people today suffer from anxiety. Some of those reasons are more identifiable than others, for instance, due to a traumatic incident or as a result a significant change in circumstances or a life event, such as getting divorced, bereavement and so on.

Sometimes the reasons for anxiety are not immediately obvious and can be a result of a build-up of stress over a period of time, until one day the amount of stress exceeds individual ability to cope with it.

We can think in terms of three different types of anxiety disorder:

Reactive anxiety

Related to some particular incident; the fear of another such incident can be overwhelming.

Conditioned anxiety

The suffered continues to be triggered by old fears to an extend that day-to-day behaviour is impaired. The person may be experiencing forgetfulness, insomnia or other similar intrusions into everyday life.

Free-floating anxiety

There seems to be no obvious reason for anxiety and this makes ithis very ifficult to cope with. There is nothing to hang it on and therefore no apparent starting point for reducing the impact.

All types of anxiety disorders can be disruptive to the daily activities, often very significantly. They cause sleep disturbances,  inability to perform well at workplace, loss of ability to temper anger and also loss of the ability to understand the source of anger, difficulty concentrating because of concentrating on the anxiety instead, and a greatly reduced sense of self-worth.

Symptoms of anxiety

People often experience physical, psychological and behavioural symptoms when they feel anxious or stressed.

Some of the most common physical symptoms of anxiety are:

• Increased heart rate
• Increased muscle tension
• “Jelly legs”
• Tingling in the hands and feet
• Hyperventilation (over breathing)
• Dizziness
• Difficulty in breathing
• Wanting to use the toilet more often
• Feeling sick
• Tight band across the chest area
• Tension headaches
• Hot flushes
• Increased perspiration
• Dry mouth
• Shaking
• Choking sensations
• Palpitations

Some of the most common psychological symptoms (the thoughts or altered perceptions we have) of anxiety are:

• Thinking that you may lose control and/or go “mad”
• Thinking that you might die
• Thinking that you may have a heart attack/be sick/faint/have a brain tumour
• Feeling that people are looking at you and observing your anxiety
• Feeling as though things are speeding up/slowing down
• Feeling detached from your environment and the people in it
• Feeling like wanting to run away/escape from the situation
• Feeling on edge and alert to everything around you
• Avoidance of any situations potential provoking anxiety.

How can Hypnotherapy , EFT and EMT help you?

Hypnotherapy, Emotional Freedom Techniques and Eye Movement Therapies are an effective way to help to manage anxiety disorders by;

• Reducing stress by relaxation and self-hypnosis techniques
• Helping to let go of anxious thoughts
• Helping to address the causes of anxiety.
• Understanding when the symptoms started and dealing with  the contributing issues
• Rebuilding confidence and self-esteem

As with any medical condition you should always see your GP first to discuss your symptoms and treatment options first and to rule out any potential underlying causes of your symptoms.

Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS)

If you suffer from Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS), you  are very aware of the emotional and physical aspects of the condition. Everyone suffers the odd upset stomach, but for  10-20 % of the population this is a regular experience of painful  abdominal spasms, bloating, diarrhoea and constipation that go with the condition. It also means that you may live with the limitations, inconvenience, and often embarrassment that result.

IBS is a sporadic and unpredictable disruption of the digestive system. Doctors are not exactly certain what causes IBS, however it occurs when the nerves and muscles of the lower bowel area are not working the way they should. IBS can affect anyone at any time in their lives, however it typically starts during late teenage years and most often affects people between 20 and 30 years of age.

It is twice as common in women as in men. Recent trends indicate that it is also now more present in older age groups.

The National Institute of Clinical Excellence (NICE) recommends the healthcare professionals should consider assessment for IBS if the person reports having had any of the below symptoms for at least 6 months. Symptoms can vary in type, frequency and severity and sometimes overlap with other gastrointestinal disorders such as non-ulcer dyspepsia or coeliac disease, but they can include;

Abdominal pain or cramps

Bloating

Change in bowel movements –diarrhoea, constipation or both

Other features such as lethargy, nausea, backache and bladder symptoms are common and may be used to support the diagnosis.

Conventional treatment includes dietary, lifestyle and physical activity advice as well as medication to target symptoms.

Food and Drink; Keeping a food diary to record what you have been eating and how your body reacts can help you spot problems and prepare a diet that helps to control your symptoms.

Some of the food groups most commonly known to trigger IBS symptoms include:

• Wheat Products
• Dairy Products
• Onions
• Caffeine-containing drinks like tea, coffee, and cola
• Chocolate

Stress and Anxiety; Stress can show itself in many different ways. It can be both healthy and unhealthy. Small amount of stress can help us stay motivated, however when stress exceeds our levels to deal with it, either as a result of sudden chance in circumstance or after slow build-up, it can lead to various health issues.

The immediate physical reactions to stress may be sweating, breathlessness, increased blood pressure, insomnia, diarrhoea, palpitations. Mental chances can include anxious and negative thoughts, low levels of energy.  While stress and anxiety do not directly cause IBS, over a long period these can contribute into development of gastrointestinal problems and can certainly trigger the symptoms of IBS.

There are many different ways to tackle stress. Keeping a diary of your feelings of stress and anxiety can help you being able to recognise stress, situations that cause stress and the feelings of stress that trigger a potential attack of IBS.

Hypnotherapy is particularly good for treating stress and anxiety through deep relaxation of the body and mind and by teaching on subconscious level how to prevent stress, build stamina and how take care of oneself.

How can Hypnotherapy help?

As with any medical condition you should always see your GP first to discuss your symptoms and treatment options. If you have already been diagnosed with IBS and conventional treatment has not helped, hypnotherapy can help you to manage IBS. Both the British Medical Association (BMA) and The National Institute of Clinical Excellence (NICE) specifically recommend hypnotherapy as a treatment option for IBS sufferers.

Hypnotherapy is an effective way to help to manage IBS through the power of the unconscious mind. The sessions we run here at Enable Potential include:

• Relaxation and stress management
• Understanding when symptoms started and dealing with contributing issues
• Dealing with triggers and promotion of physical and emotional healing.
• Management of symptoms whenever they occur, using self-hypnosis and pain management techniques
• Rebuilding confidence and self-esteem.

In general, most people start to experience positive changes (physical, mental and emotional) from the first hypnotherapy session.  BMA recommends 10 sessions for successful treatment, however we at Enable Potential have found that fewer sessions are effective, especially when supported by self-hypnosis recordings.

As each person is unique, it would be wrong to state the exact number of sessions needed, but typically you should see significant improvements in symptoms and management of symptoms after initial 2-3 sessions. At Enable Potential we aim to help you with as few sessions as possible.